Cure for Cancer postponed for Another Two Centuries

People in Boulder, CO are having their kids tested for a "sports gene."



How many things are wrong with this? Let me count the ways...

Let's start with the fact that, conspicuously, no one is testing to see whether their kids would be predisposed to, I don't know, science, or maths, or art, or music. Instead they're banking on their kids becoming professional athletes, which is wiiiide open for new employment these days.

And then there's the whole "WTF do you think you're doing testing for a goddamn sports gene when real genetic threats like Tay-Sachs and fucking Sickle Cell still threaten our children daily?!" argument. But that might be a bit tacky, dontcha think?

In the article, someone made the comparison to Hitler-esque eugenics, Master Race and all that. To be honest, though, I'm not all that worried about that happening, because we all know how that particular experiment ended. (cf 1936 Olympics, Jesse Owens)

“But if you wait until high school or college to find out if you have a good athlete on your hands, by then it will be too late. We need to identify these kids from 1 and up, so we can give the parents some guidelines on where to go from there.”

Such as Child Services for the abuse, Drug Rehab for the addiction (steroids if you're lucky, but I'm thinking heroine, meth, and prozac), and Planned Parenthood for that inconvenient fetus around Nationals time.

I'm going to sleep. Wake me when we have a gold medalist in the javelin as World President for Life. Oh, and have the gun ready nearby, cuz one of us is going down, and let's face it, I'm a shitty optimist.